Altruistic Love

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.




Inspiring quote by Marianne Williamson is from her book, A Return To Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles,

There's a story I would like to share with you. It was inspired by the writing of Loren Eiseley. Loren was a very special person because he combined the best of two cultures. He was a scientist and a poet. From those two perspectives, he wrote insightfully and beautifully about the world and our role in it.

Once upon a time, there was a wise man, much like Eiseley himself, who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had the habit of walking along the beach before he began his work. One day he was walking along the shore; as he looked down the beach, he saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself to think of someone who would dance to the day, so he began to walk faster to catch up. As he got closer, he saw that it was a young man and the young man wasn't dancing, but instead, he was reaching down to the shore, picking up something and very gently throwing it into the ocean.

As he got closer he called out, "Good morning! What are you doing?" The young man paused, looked up and replied, "Throwing Starfish into the ocean."

"I guess I should have asked; why are you throwing Starfish into the ocean?"

"The sun is up and the tide is going out and if I don't throw them in they'll die."

"But young man, don't you realize that there are miles and miles of beach and Starfish all along it, you can't possibly make a difference!"

The young man listened politely, then bent down, picked up another Starfish and threw it into the sea, past the breaking waves. "It made a difference for that one."

His response surprised the man, he was upset, he didn't know how to reply, so instead he turned away and walked back to the cottage to begin his writings.

All day long as he wrote, the image of that young man haunted him; he tried to ignore it, but the vision persisted. Finally, late in the afternoon, he realized that he the scientist, he the poet, had missed the essential nature of the young man's actions. Because he realized that what the young man was doing was choosing not to be an observer in the universe and watch it pass by, but was choosing to be an actor in the universe and make a difference. He was embarrassed.

That night he went to bed, troubled. When morning came, he awoke knowing that he had to do something; so he got up, put on his clothes, went to the beach and found the young man; and with him spent the rest of the morning throwing Starfish into the ocean.

You see, what the young man's actions represent is something that is special in each and every one of us. We have all been gifted with the ability to make a difference. And if we can, like the young man, become aware of that gift, we gain through the strength of our vision the power to shape the future.

And that is your challenge, and that is my challenge. We must find our Starfish, and if we throw our stars wisely and well, I have no question that the 21st century is going to be a wonderful place.


Remember:

Vision without action is merely a dream
Action without vision just passes time
Vision with action can change the world

The first major factor to consider when analyzing a person's hands is the concept of left and right being reflections of the subconscious and conscious mind, respectively. The left hand is a reflection of man's instinct and those beliefs and attitudes that are buried deep within the subconscious mind. The right hand is a reflection of man's logical mind and those personal thoughts and preferences that are consciously known even though they are not always discussed openly. The second concept of major significance is that of wearing rings on any fingers. The wearing of rings will reveal areas of inhibitions, restrictions, or emphasis in the social realms governed by that finger. And what if a person happens to not wear any rings? Although it is more difficult, it is possible to obtain the same analysis by noting those fingers that are the most prominent, those that are hidden, or those either permanently or temporarily marred.

As an introductory example, if the hands are hidden the person in question could well be hiding something - either from you or from himself. Imagine that you are with a real estate agent who has brought you to what he claims to be "the buy of the week." As you walk through the house and he describes its assets and low cost you notice that he consistently keeps his hands in his pockets, tucked under his belt, or behind his back. By hiding his hands this man may be announcing that he is hiding his true self. Perhaps he knows that he is speaking of untruths and is appropriately covering his true opinion of the house. You may, however, note that he only occasionally hides his hands; this is when it is time to note just what details he is discussing when he tucks them away - these will be the topics to investigate further.

It would also be important at this point to distinguish between the right and left hand since it may be only one hand that is hidden from view. If the right hand is hidden the person is hiding and may well be aware that he is concealing or protecting an area of his true self. If, however, it is only the left hand that is hidden the person may not be consciously aware of his withdrawal. This is the subconscious self, that aspect that is often hidden from the person's own understanding of himself. In this case he is hiding from himself just as much as he is hiding from you. Should you question his secrecy he may be left just as puzzled as you, whereas if it were the right hand and you actually questioned him, he more readily recognize his secrecy.

Curious to read more? Such concepts may not seem such a stretch of the imagination after absorbing the following pages and then spending some time observing hands, fingers, and rings. Let's begin with an overview of each finger.

The Thumb: Willpower

The thumb is the willpower finger. This is the finger that signals the approval of "thumbs up" or "thumbs down", that points to the self in a moment of personal pride, that closes over a fist when personally attacked. It is associated with the total self. General opinion has always maintained that the hand consists of four fingers and a thumb, with somewhat vague reasoning for why the thumb is considered separate from the rest. This same separation of the thumb from the rest of the fingers arises in any metaphysical interpretation; it represents mankind surrounded by the cosmos. It is the physical stamp of man, the unique being and independent thinker. The thumb is the vehicle for logic and willpower - those characteristics that govern man's actions and interaction within his surroundings. To put it more simply, the thumb represents the self. It sits apart from the other fingers and yet its base holds the roots of each of the other fingers. The self, then, has the capacity to use from each area of life that which it chooses to draw upon for its existence or survival.

A person who consistently keeps the thumb well separated from the rest of the fingers is a person who insists upon freedom of thought and action. This person values independence and the more prominently the thumbs are displayed, the more important is the sense of freedom at that moment. Insisting upon standing as a unique individual, such a person will not allow any outside factors to influence personal opinions. Should the situation arise while talking, notice the person sitting nearby with the thumbs prominently displayed near the mouth. That's the one who is unconsciously signalling a desire to speak, to verbalize opinions or attitudes. That's the one who is probably not listening as much as planning what to say next.

If a person joins the thumb with any of the other fingers it is exerting added influence and willpower in the direction of that finger and its relationship to the self. This will be easily recognized once the reader has a working knowledge of the influences of each of the other fingers. This tucking of the thumbs into the palms or beneath a surface is the only way to restrict the willpower; the thumb is the only finger that is never restricted by a ring. Should you meet someone who is wearing some type of band around the thumb, consider if that person might have a severe or self-imposed limitation of willpower and logic. A major growth or oversized knuckle on the thumb might indicate a permanent blockage of personal willpower.

Given just this knowledge of the thumb it is possible to create an endless list of physical manifestations of a person's sense of self. For example, when your child closes his or her hands in a fist, are the thumbs placed inside or outside the fingers? One position conveys an intensity of willpower and mental domination while the other conveys submission or insecurity. When you place your hands together in prayer and interlock your thumbs, which thumb is resting on top of the other? Are you allowing the conscious or the subconscious mind to dominate your meditation?

When you hold hands with your lover what do you do with your thumbs? Are they covering all of your partner's fingers or only a few or none at all? How much do you allow that person to exert personal willpower, to be true to self? How much of that person's existence do you attempt to control or influence? These questions and many others can be easily answered with careful study of the thumb, especially in relation to the remaining four fingers.

The Index Finger: Authority

The first, or index finger is the authority finger. This is the finger that wags in disapproval, that gestures informed or stubborn expertise, that indicates silent direction and commands. It is associated with leadership and ambition. It is rather interesting to note those fashion seekers who wear rings on their index fingers. In this day of literally everyone's liberation it is ironic to note an increasing number of women and teenagers who are either consciously or subconsciously restricting their authority. Equally interesting is that children seem to instinctively react to anyone who prominently displays the authority finger. It is certainly their most commonly used finger as they try to grow into an authoritative individual. And heaven help the child who scolds a parent while pointing that finger! Usually earns a "Don't you talk to me that way!"

How many people do you know who hold their glass or coffee cup with their authority finger extended over it? This is the trait of a leader or at least of persistent assertiveness. Whether or not the direction of that leadership is beneficial or destructive is another consideration.

When do you find yourself holding on to that finger with your other hand? It is at that moment that you should check to see what type of authority you are working to withhold or control. How often do you find the tips of your thumb and index finger locked together in a circle of enforced authority? This will be when you are determined to have your way or assert your ideas. How often do you sit with your authority fingers pressed into the sides of your forehead? This is a concentrated effort to bring forth a sense of self-control and arises in solitude as well as in social confrontations. The index finger poised over the lips would indicate that you have something to say about the thought or topic but are holding back your opinions. It can also convey a conscious effort to draw forth the correct words to make your point. Is your authority finger the most used, the most displayed, or the first one injured?

The Middle Finger: Identity

The second finger is the identity finger. This is the finger most often used in obscene gesturing when one wishes to express an offense to personal dignity. This seems to be the finger with the most strength and balance, rooted firmly in the center of the hand. It is associated with our role in life, practicality, and the regulation of the foundations and limits of self. This finger announces "I am" and governs the way we see ourselves, our potentials, and our limitations.

To somehow bind this finger adds to those innate restrictions and announces a definite confusion or disappointment with the sense of identity and role in life. Perhaps it is quite natural for this to be the finger most commonly used in obscene gestures; it seems to be the one that imposes the most stress of its own so that it, in turn, becomes the one a person uses to release stress whenever the ego is threatened. Any person who consistently displays this finger in anger is revealing a threat to the ego that is somehow a constant one yet is often self-imposed.

A ring on this finger can announce that the person is unsure of personal roles or a place in society. Many times you will find a person linking the tip of the third finger with the tip of the thumb. This is a direct effort to enhance willpower with the support of total ego. It will be difficult to convince this person of any new concepts or to win any verbal or strategic confrontation.

When this finger is marred, hidden or badly damaged, the person could probably use some help in establishing a secure identity and confidence in present social or business roles. It should also be noted that this finger will take on added significance as a person grows older; a young child is naturally concerned about who he or she is, while an older person might be caught up in unnecessary worry over a mundane professional role being an indication of worth as a human being.

The Ring Finger: Creativity

The third, or ring, finger is the creativity finger. It is the least independent of the fingers, making it difficult to operate as a single unit. To find a use for this finger as an actual tool would certainly require some creativity in itself. Instead it is most often used in conjunction with the little finger. Since this is the finger for most rings, it is also associated with affections, optimism, and artistic appreciation.

This finger governs the potential of the shared self - what a person creates for self and for others as well as the legacies left after passing on. Such creativity extends to physical creation as well as material and mental creation. This is the source of productive energy and is used in creating a further extension of the self, be it a life partner, a child, an idea, or a new invention in the professional world.

The ring finger on the left hand is the only one with a direct connection to the heart. It is therefore more than coincidence that this became the finger that we restrict with a band at the marriage ceremony. It is a self-imposed restriction of the subconscious desires to share the self with others. A wedding, friendship, or engagement ring announces that the person's creative fantasies are limited to the donor of that ring.

It is not unusual today to see someone wearing multiple rings on the ring finger. Wedding rings are either thick or thin bands for men but the women have a choice of a variety of styles, shapes and glamour. One woman may wear only a thin band while another may wear several thin bands on either side of an engagement ring. Both women allow some freedom within their marriage but the latter imposes many small restrictions in her personal creativity while the former sees her marriage as a total yet less limiting environment. The woman who wears an extremely thick wedding band is one who lives under strong emotional ties and feels a great deal of dependency upon her husband.

Very often there is no mate involved in the analysis of this finger and it is at this time that the person's career or conception of personal skills and talents should be considered. If this finger is laden with rings, in poor condition, or temporarily injured, the person is undergoing conflicts over self worth as a productive performer in society. Again, if the ring or any physical damage is on the right hand the person is most likely very aware of this internal conflict, while a ring on the left hand would indicate that the person may not have fully realized the internal dissatisfaction or confusion with a present environment.

It is also important to note any time that the ring finger is hidden or being prominently displayed. It is not often that this finger stands alone; more often it is fondled or hidden by the other hand. Under such conditions the person is somehow concerned with personal creativity, love of life, or appreciation of another's creativity. It may be worthwhile to consider the possibility of jealousy, envy, or even hidden fantasies.

The Little Finger: Relationships

The little finger is the relationship finger. It is located farthest from the thumb, the self, and is turned out toward other people and the outer environment. This finger expresses man's attitudes toward personal and sexual relationships. It is associated with rewards, both on a personal and materialistic level.

The little finger, like the thumb, can either be found close to the other fingers of the hand or be placed a far distance from the rest. A wide space would indicate freedom and independence of action in relationships with people and in all money-making endeavors. A more closed position would indicate that the person is less free with confidence, attentions, or speculations in finances. This finger indicates the person's confidence in dealing with money - especially the ability to attract money through other people. The little finger also relates a person's attitude about sexuality and relationships with the opposite sex. It will be through this finger that you can detect how appealing people consider themselves to be, how easily they feel they can create love and harmony when in contact with other people, or how well and how easily they believe they can express themselves to others.

To wear a ring on the little finger might announce an insecurity in relationships with people, perhaps even a sexual insecurity. From this assumption might then come the observation that the person is unsure about how he or she relates to people, what the public's true impression might be, or how effective he/she is in asserting an authentic personality. This person may feel deficient in verbal skills or may not feel free to openly express feelings either in public or in a personal relationship. This is the finger of expression and a banded finger suggests self-imposed or subconscious restrictions in that area. This can be the most sensitive area of analysis, especially if the ring is worn on the left hand. In this case you will be identifying an insecurity that the person in question is not at all ready to recognize in himself.

The same interpretations would hold true any time the little finger is hidden from view, constantly held apart from the other fingers or placed in a prominent position around the face. However, there are times when the prominence of the little finger indicates that the person is placing sexuality right up front for all to see. In this case we have a person of great confidence -- which may or may not be a cover for actual insecurities. You must then take in all of your impressions of the man or woman before attempting to assign a sense of magnetic bravado to this person. Anytime the hands are held at the face the little fingers will either be the first displayed or will be hidden against the skin and the difference should be considered.

You should find in your observations of people that the little fingers take a great deal of abuse and are often the most hidden or the most caressed of the ten fingers. Many people, especially women, develop a habit of nibbling on the nails or tips of the little fingers. Others will extend it straight into the air like a miniature radar unit, often while drinking or passing an item to another. Should a person constantly pull on the little finger it could be revealing stress in that area much the same way as does the person who persistently tucks it away inside a pocket, under a sleeve, or behind an ear. This is the person who may forever worry about money and its sources, who may always question a partner's love and trust, or who may always need a boost in self-confidence before attempting any new relationships.

The willpower of the self, authority, identity, creativity and personal relationships - the five areas that take in all aspects of man's involvement with his environment. The nails of each finger grow, break off, and grow again as we take on and utilize new attitudes after discarding old ideas and beliefs. When a person either cuts or breaks a nail it is an indication of new beginnings in that area, often the result of earlier stress. Bitten nails will reveal extreme tension while manicured nails reveal idealistic and harmonious attitudes. Even the color of a woman's nail polish will reveal the quality or tape of lifestyle she is seeking to attract into her life.

As mentioned earlier, any one or all of the fingers may be hidden or restricted or covered by a partner's more dominating hands. Those that fit these conditions will reflect those areas that need personal development. Any person who does a great deal of gesturing while talking is fairly secure and should only be cautioned not to lean too far to the extreme of dominating any and every situation. Should a person often brush or massage the face while speaking, he or she is making an extended effort to bring forth just the right words to express an idea. It is often interesting to note just when a person sits on the hands, places one behind the back, or holds the fingers entwined and hidden in the hair. Certainly there are those times when a person's hands are only chilled and he/she is seeking added warmth by crossing the arms and tucking the fingers into the crooks of the elbows. But more often than not that person is hiding from the present topic or is holding back true feelings.

Consider the man who consistently cracks his knuckles; he is making an added effort to "pack" his awareness and knowledge into specific categories or is working to relieve stress in each area corresponding to each of the fingers. This man, or any person with well-knotted joints, needs to think and reason, will insist upon order and logic, and will be fairly consistent in the actions and attitudes of those areas revealed through such knobby fingers. Not all of the fingers of each hand need be knotted; some may be so while others are smooth. Those smoother fingers will reveal the areas of attention that the person allows to be more fluid and responsive. In these areas the person will more easily pick up the impressions of the environment and rely more on intuition in most decision making roles. A smooth finger reveals less stress and a reliance upon inspiration while the knotted fingers convey barriers that must be overcome before any new thoughts or events will be incorporated.

Photographs that show the positions and rings of various fingers will reveal much about the people and how they relate to each other. Check to see who displays the hands and who hides them, who holds onto another person and with what hand and what fingers predominant, who interlocks the fingers with a lover's and who completely covers the lover's hands.

Certainly it is most important to examine your own hands and be constantly aware of their placement and condition from day to day. Do you have any temporary markings on any of your fingers? If so, relate them to the right or left hand and as to whether they are on the inside or the outside of the hand. If the marking is on the inside of the hand it indicates an internal force or stress. If it is on the outside it shows a stress that is coming from external circumstances or another person. If possible to remember, note exactly what you are doing or thinking at any moment that you actually injure a finger. Does it point out where you are undergoing stress ln your personal, social or professional life? You can then also note whether that stress is internal or being brought on by someone else and whether the stress is one of conscious recognition or one that is being brought up from the subconscious mind. The same analysis will hold true at any time that you suddenly break a fingernail.

Are you a smoker? What hand do you prefer when you smoke? This will show whether you prefer to have your conscious or subconscious hand always swinging freely in the air. Some have been known to cut down on cigarettes by learning to always smoke with their conscious hand and thereby force the habit to their attention. Others will continue to smoke just for the chance to always have their authority and identity fingers at the forefront while they try to maintain control of any given situation.

Are your hands always wide open with fingers spread or do your fingers curl inward protecting the palms of your hands? The first position shows an openness than can sometimes border on submission. The second, more closed position, reveals a person who is more protective of personal privacy. If the fists are tightly closed and all the fingers forced together it indicates a person who is too withdrawn and has a great deal of difficulty in relating to other people or a personal environment.

How often do you tend to your hands and fingernails? A manicure is a conscious effort to clean up your life and begin anew. The condition and length of nails will reveal the care you take with all aspects of your life. The longer the nails, the more idealistic we are, especially if we insist upon maintaining the longer nails while others have broken and remain noticeably shorter. The harder the nails, the harder the person in attitudes, the more determined in asserting unique personality.

All of these aspects of hands, fingers, and rings are given in the hope that you will begin to use these tools to discover the self and those attitudes and behaviors that have become so routine that only such a new concept can help in objective analysis. Fingers are the reflection of life's more subtle impressions; may each person first study the self, then read the world anew.

CHICAGO - A MECHANISM in the brain may explain why some people keep their cool and others crumble under stress, United States researchers said on Thursday.

'We have identified the ways in which the brain naturally copes with chronic stressful experiences,' said Dr Vaishnav Krishnan of the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center, whose study appears in the journal, Cell.

Psychologists have long understood that some people are more vulnerable than others to stress, which can lead to depression and even post-traumatic stress disorder.

But little is known about mechanisms in the brain that explain this vulnerability.

Dr Krishnan and colleagues set out to study this problem in mice that were exposed to stress.

What they found was mice that were most vulnerable to stress had too much of a chemical in a region of the brain that processes reward signals.

And they found a significant increase in this same chemical in humans with depression.

It turns out that resilient mice produce a kind of protective response that allows them to recover from stress.

Vulnerable mice lack this defence.

'Active process'
'One of the major insights provided by this work is that resilience to stress is an active process,' Dr Eric Nestler of UT Southwestern said in a statement.

Drs Nestler, Krishnan and colleagues placed genetically similar mice into a cage with a large, aggressive mouse - basically a bully.

Then they recorded their ability to interact socially, especially when exposed to other, more aggressive mice.

While some behaved timidly even 30 days after the bully encounter, others had shaken it off and were able to interact normally.

The researchers then looked at two of the brain's reward centres - the ventral tegmental area and the nucleus accumbens - to see if there were differences there. These areas are part of the reward circuit of the brain and also known to be involved in fear conditioning.

What they found is that neurons were firing rapidly in the stressed-out mice, releasing a nerve growth factor called brain-derived neurotrophic factor or BDNF that has been linked with poor coping skills.

Vulnerable mice showed an increase of BDNF in the nucleus accumbens; resilient ones did not.

Resilient mice put the brakes on this excess neuron firing - and increased release of BDNF - by increasing the production of potassium channels, which govern the speed at which neurons fire.

Dr Krishnan said the finding is important because the researchers also found high concentrations of BDNF in tissue taken from this same brain region in depressed people.

'It seems to be a signature of vulnerability to depression,' Dr Krishnan said.

The researchers think the finding might help lead to new therapies that build up resiliency in people. -- REUTERS

LONDON - GOSSIP is more powerful than truth, a study showed on Monday, suggesting people believe what they hear through the grapevine even if they have evidence to the contrary.

Researchers, testing students using a computer game, also found gossip played an important role when people make decisions, said Dr Ralf Sommerfeld, an evolutionary biologist at the Max Planck Institute in Germany, who led the study.

'We show that gossip has a strong influence... even when participants have access to the original information as well as gossip about the same information,' the researchers wrote in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

'Thus, it is evident that gossip has a strong manipulative potential.'

In the study, the researchers gave the students money and allowed them to give it to others in a series of rounds. The students also wrote notes about how others played the game that everyone could review.

Students tended to give less money to people described as 'nasty misers' or 'scrooges' and more to those depicted as 'generous players' or 'social players', Dr Sommerfeld said.

'People only saw the gossip, not the past decisions,' he said in a telephone interview. 'People really reacted on it.'

The researchers then took the game a step further and showed the students the actual decisions people had made. But they also supplied false gossip that contradicted that evidence.

In these cases, the students based their decisions to award money on the gossip, rather than the hard evidence, showing such information is a powerful tool, Dr Sommerfeld said.

'Rationally if you know what the people did, you should care, but they still listened to what others said,' he said.

'They even reacted on it if they knew better.'

Researchers have long used similar games to study how people cooperate and the impact of gossip in groups. Scientists define gossip as social information spread about a person who is not present, Dr Sommerfeld said.

In evolutionary terms, gossip can be an important tool for people to acquire information about others' reputations or navigate through social networks at work and in their everyday lives, the study said. -- REUTERS